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Intactivists are Dicks–and Crybabies too!

Intactivists didn’t get their way and now they’re throwing an epic tantrum that would even make Veruca Salt stop and say, “Wow, you’re a spoiled fucking brat.” Not because they care about Chase, the child in the middle of the battle between his mother, Heather Hironimus, and his father, Dennis Nebus. They are losing their collective shit because they care more about dick skin and attention-seeking than actual, real-life, living, breathing, children.

I’ve written about the loathsome internet creatures called intactivists before here:

Intactivists are a group of melodramatic nutcases that claim to care about children and their human rights. They make anti-vaxxers look like scientific, logical and rational human beings. The Hironimus/Nebus case proves that all they care about is furthering their agenda and garnering attention for the lunatics that lead this fringe movement.

For all who don’t know what is going on in the Heather Hironimus case, here is a quick summary. I really don’t want to get into the rights and wrongs of the case, circumcision or the parents. I do want to make this blog post’s focus the hilarious, histrionic reaction of the vile windbags whom call themselves intactivists.

Heather Hironimus signed a parental agreement when Chase was born, agreeing he be circumcised as an infant. She changed her mind and tried going to the courts, dragging out the process and stalling the procedure. Chase is now 4. The courts upheld the legal document she signed and sided with the father, ordering her to consent to the procedure. Intactivists convinced her to flee with Chase and go into hiding. She took him to a battered women’s shelter and claimed the father abused her. The judge told her to sign the consent form or face jail time. She was arrested, and faced with losing custody as well as a jail sentence. Her lawyer convinced her to sign the papers. Intactivists are now pissed off.

Chase’s father, Dennis Nebus, has refused to publicly discuss the case or the decision to circumcise his son. Much of the information we see on the internet is skewed to the mother’s and intactivists’ favor because of this. The mom was ordered not to discuss the procedure with Chase. She told him his daddy wanted to cut his penis off. He is now terrified of the operation (of course) and the intactivists are waving around “Chase said no! His bodily autonomy is being ignored!” while ignoring the fact he probably wouldn’t be so scared if they didn’t fill his head with their hysteria and nonsense in the first place.

The intactivist leader, who legally goes by the name Brother K (because he fancies himself a civil rights and human rights activist), goes around the country parading his red-paint stained crotch. The following is the extent of his human/civil rights activism.

Looks like you need to switch to a stronger absorbency tampon, Mr. K.

Looks like you need to switch to a stronger absorbency tampon, Mr. K.

Dred Scott is spinning in his grave.

Dred Scott is spinning in his grave.


I can’t. I have no words.

Brother Kook and the rest of his intactivist sycophants latched on to this case and exploited Heather and Chase. They encouraged her to break the law, kidnap Chase, and hide out in a battered woman’s shelter–taking up valuable bed space from someone who is an actual victim of domestic abuse. They also raised money to get Heather an attorney, Thomas Hunker. However, when the attorney acted in his client’s best interests, (what a good attorney is supposed to do) and not in the interests of the intactivists (publicity stunts and attention-seeking), the intactinuts stomped their feet and flailed their arms like the attention-seeking, crybaby, narcissistic children they are.

Her attorney acts on her behalf, not yours

Her attorney acts on her behalf, not yours. Not one needs to confer with you so that she can get custody of her son back.


So it’s a conspiracy, Mr. Kook?

That is her attorney, not yours! For someone who oputs himself on par with civil rights leaders, you sure don't know shit about how the American justice system works.

For someone who puts himself on par with civil rights leaders, you sure don’t know shit about how the American justice system works. That’s HER attorney!


Come at me bro!

Now that's a rational response!

Now that’s a rational response!

Hoping a 4 year old dies and becomes a martyr for your cause. Because you totally care about kids, right?

Hoping a 4 year old dies and becomes a martyr for your cause. Because you totally care about kids, right?

So you would never see your child again if he got circumcised? Do you even care about your child or are you just an idiot?

So you would never see your child again if he got circumcised? Do you even care about your child or are you just an idiot?

So Hairy Hollie, you admit it was never about Chase or his mom and all about your foreskin worship.

So Hairy Hollie, you admit it was never about Chase or his mom, and it was about your foreskin worship all along?

Intactivists proved with the Hironimus/Nebus case that they care more about penises than the people attached to them. This is why intactivism is an extremely flawed movement and intactivists should be ignored, no matter how loud they scream or how red they paint their crotches.


I was Homeschooled by a Narcissist… And Other Horror Stories from American Suburbia


With the demise of public education in this country–which includes under-funding by the government, overcrowded classrooms, ineffectual administrators, and private entities like testing companies having their filthy hands all over your children and their data–it is inevitable that the homeschool movement has grown exponentially over the last couple of years. Instead of trying to improve public education and how our politicians treat our schools, our teachers and our children, many have chosen to pull their children from school all together and educate them at home. Even with a less-than-perfect public education system, I believe it is still infinitely better than homeschooling your child.

This is not an anti-homeschooling blog. There are some instances when I believe homeschooling is appropriate, such as a child with really bad anxiety, a bully situation, an injury or remote living. Even in these situations, there is a right way to homeschool. This includes following professionally designed and state mandated curriculum. It includes professional oversight, with trained and state certified educators coming to your home to make sure your child is learning everything they would in a traditional school setting. And it includes opportunities for group learning with peers, in a format such as a homeschool collective.

And it’s not just fundamentalist Christians homeschooling their children either. Many people in the atheist, skeptic and non-believer communities are homeschooling their kids as well. I find this trend to be very troubling. As skeptics, we tend to be the first ones to condemn a non-vaxxing parent for using snake oil to treat their sick child instead of taking them to a doctor. We criticize parents who think a google search can replace a medical degree. We loathe parents that take medical care into their own hands and think they can replace the professional education and training of doctors, nurses and medical staff. Why don’t some of my fellow skeptics feel the same way about education and teaching?

Some of the excuses I’ve heard from my fellow skeptics for homeschooling their kids are just as ridiculous, if not more ridiculous, than reasons given by religious fundamentalists. The following are some reasons I’ve heard in favor of homeschooling followed by my personal commentary on why they are complete bullshit.

1) “I think I can do a better job than anybody when it comes to educating my children.”

No you can’t. Get over yourself.  Teaching is NOT “so easy a caveman can do it.”

I don’t care if you are Neil Degrasse Tyson. Nothing takes the place of a licensed, professional, experienced, teacher in a public or private classroom who is surrounded by other professional educators, counselors and school support staff. I used to teach high school and I WOULD NEVER homeschool my kids. EVER. Do you think I am extensively trained in early childhood neurological development? How to teach reading to a child? Methods in teaching fractions? I can teach my child about the rise of dictatorial governments throughout Europe following World War I, but I think he would want to learn how to read and play in the sandbox first. If you think you can do at better job educating your child than hundreds of rigorously trained and vetted professionals, you are a self-important narcissist with a grandiose sense-of-self.

2) “I don’t like the curriculum being dictated by a school board. I want to make my own curriculum.”

Okay. That’s nice. You think as a teacher I liked everything in my social studies curriculum? Of course not. But most teachers know how to play with the curriculum and make it enjoyable for students to learn. Curriculum and standards are there for a reason; they ensure your children learn what they need to know to not only graduate, but to become well-rounded adults. Also, professionally trained educators are constantly designing and modifying curriculum to reflect the latest standards, methods and innovations in education. Curriculum is NOT designed by an army of Illuminati robots despite what you read in your FB parenting group.

If you’re wondering why we now have a generation of young adults who think vaccines cause autism and the holocaust never happened, blame the parents who think they know how to write curriculum simply because they shot a child out of their nutsack and/or vagina. Don’t like the curriculum? Supplement your child’s education with further materials and learning experiences. Have a meaningful conversation with them. Visit a museum. Give them experiences that will enrich their lives and grow their empathy, compassion and curiosity. Limiting the amount of people who they learn from, including peers, will only limit the amount of knowledge they acquire.

3) “I want to teach my children what I want them to learn, not what teachers and the government wants my kids to learn.”

A person gains culture and knowledge through interaction with others. I had teachers of all different personalities, political affiliations, backgrounds and cultures. I had mean teachers. I had nice teachers. I had sane teachers. I had crazy teachers. I had extremely intelligent teachers and a handful of clueless ones too. I learned from them all. I learned a variety of views and experiences.

I’m a non-believer. I’d like my son to be a non-believer as well. However, if he learns some religion and wants to be a bible thumping Christian, then I’m cool with that too. As long as he treats others with respect, kindness and compassion. Many homeschooling parents are afraid their little snowflakes will learn something evil or different at school from teachers or other children–views that might question a parent’s authority, beliefs, and fears. What if I told you not everyone has to think as you do, not even your child. They are not an extension of you. They are individuals with their own thoughts and agency. If you only want your child to know what you WANT them to know–to only know your views and your experiences–you are a self-important narcissist with a grandiose sense-of-self.

4) “I don’t want the school to call Children’s Services on me.”

This is a reason why some homeschooling/unschooling parents don’t want to send their kids to evil government schools. Teachers, counselors and other school staff are mandated reporters and are trained to identify signs of abuse and neglect, such as changes in behavior or physical appearance. Mental, emotional, physical and sexual abuse can not be detected by school staff when a child does not attend a school. Homeschooling is a way abusers can get away with their crimes. It also prevents a child from escaping from an abusive situation, even if it’s just for six hours a day. And if you’re looking for a common thread here to connect to my other points, narcissistic personality disorder is a common feature of abusive parents.

5) “The schools are bad in our area.”

This is racist/classist code language for “I don’t want my little Caligula sharing a classroom with a poor and/or brown child.” What is interesting about this argument is that I see it put forth mostly by so-called progressives and leftists. If you’re so progressive, you should have no issues with your children learning from children who are different from them.

6) “My kid is not challenged at public school because he/she is too smart.”

Most parents who proclaim their kids are too smart and therefore bored at public school are completely full of shit. They are suffering from special snowflake syndrome; they think their special DNA and special homeschooling is producing the next child prodigy. These are the types of parents that take all the credit for their child’s hard work and achievements, since they were the only ones smart enough to recognize their child was a special snowflake whom is too good to share a classroom with the rest of the plebes.

Teachers do something now called differentiated instruction. We recognize that every child has specific strengths and weaknesses, and we individually tailor instruction just for your special snowflake! There are special programs for gifted and talented children. Your kid being a genius or a prodigy is still no excuse for you to solely educate them. Wouldn’t they become a better genius or prodigy if they learned from others besides yourself? Isolating them from the ideas of others because you think your child is better than everyone else is definitely not going to make them better than everyone else. But let’s admit, homeschooling is not about them. It’s about you and your ego.

7) “Public education is in shambles. If the schools were better, I’d send my kids and I can’t afford private school “

If you gave a damn about public education, you’ would still send your kids to school while fighting to change policies like other parents and professionals do.  So let’s get to what this is really about: you. Homeschooling proves to the rest of your friends and family (and blog subscribers) what a super mom or dad you are by taking on a huge responsibility, while being smarter (and smuggier) than the average momma bear.

“Look at me–Look at me. Look how awesome I am homeschooling my special snowflake. I’m so much better than you! Nanny Nanny poo poo!

The Baron and the Woo-heads


I love reading about psychological conditions and how the human mind works.  I am fascinated with disorders such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder, and how these conditions affect individuals and the people around them. One psychological condition that is equally fascinating and horrifying is Baron von Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy (BVMP). This is where a parent or caregiver seeks attention and sympathy through the intentional medical abuse of his/her child. I’m being fair and politically correct here because most people with BVMP are women and hence, mothers. These mothers seek constant medical treatments and often intentionally make their kids sick to perpetuate the lie that the child is chronically ill.

The issue of BVMP has come up recently in the case of Lacey Spears, a self-proclaimed mommy blogger and rejector of  science-based medicine. Before the birth of her son, she had a long history of compulsive lying and story telling. One example of her outrageous lies was when she claimed a boy she nannied was her own child, even using the child’s image on her Myspace page and captioning his pictures with such phrases as, “Hey there mommy Lacey”.

For the five years her own son was on this earth, he was sick. It started with constant ear infections and 23 visits to the hospital in the first year of his life. Garnett (Lacey’s son) was put on feeding tubes because of a “failure to thrive”. Lacey Spears chronicled every last detail of Garnett’s medical issues on social media, where she received an outpouring of sympathy and attention for her plight. This is why BVMP do what they do. They thrive on the attention and in the age of the internet, this level of attention increases exponentially with every like and share.

How was Lacey Spears able to get away with her crimes for so long? For one, she moved frequently during her son’s short life. Another reason could be disbelief; no one wants to believe a mother would harm her own child simply for the attention. However, I believe the most important reason why Garnett is no longer with us and suffered needlessly at the hands of his BVMP mother is because of the popularity of the alternative medicine movement, especially online.

Lacey sought out “holistic” doctors who would most likely not question why her son was so sick all the time. She moved to an “organic and alternative lifestyle commune” in NYC’s northern suburbs, where she could hide away and not have to account for her behavior. Finally, Lacey received the attention she craved from an online community of parents, self-proclaimed experts and FAUX medical professionals (i.e. naturopaths and chiropractors) who believe that science-based medicine, chemtrails, fluoride, non-organic food and vaccines are killing our children slowly. (What a terrible irony that Lacey was the one who was killing her child slowly). In a  June 2012 Facebook post, Lacey proclaimed the following:

“No (Garnett) does not watch tv, drink purple kook-aid (sic), eat ice cream or consume sugar of any form… He isn’t vaccinated, doesn’t follow western medicine “

It is my hypothesis that Lacey’s BVMP  is much more prevalent in the online alternative medicine/anti-vax/anti-science community. It is my belief that many of these anti-science moms either suffer from intense maternal narcissism, and/or some varying degree of Munchausen by Proxy–most not as severe as Lacey Spears’ but enough to where it is causing psychological harm to their children and might be causing physical harm.

Go to any anti-vaccine Facebook page and you will see moms like Lacey everyday; moms who claim their children’s myriad health issues–everything from eczema, asthma and autism–are caused by science-based medicine and science-based nutrition. How many times have you seen stories of “immediate vaccine injury” and not think the parent was just-a-wee bit exaggerating her story? I saw a woman claim she knew her daughter was vaccine injured because “as soon as the poisons were injected into (her little snowflake) she let out a blood curdling scream.” Um, yeah–pretty much every kid does that when he gets a needle put inside him. I know quite a few adults who do too.

On pages such as My Child’s Vaccine Reaction, you read of heartbreaking stories of kids succumbing to SIDS and the mother blaming the child’s recent DTap vaccination. And do you know what else you will see when these parents discuss their children’s health issues or death? An outpouring of  sympathy from their online community. Even if you know the kid’s health problems and/or death was not caused by vaccines, you’d be a real douchebag to question a grieving mother, right?

And how many kids are being harmed? How many kids are being subjected to pediatric chiropractic to cure a strep throat? How many kids are needlessly going through torturous chelation therapies to “detox” themselves from vaccines? How many kids are being given belladonna instead of Tylenol for a fever because their mom thinks Tylenol is “the red liquid of death”? How many kids are going to suffer through months of whooping-cough to satisfy their mother’s endless need for attention?

I think we need to hold the alternative health death community accountable for the harboring of terrible, awful people such as Lacey Spears. It is time to re-examine cases that sound all to familiar to Garnett’s case before we lose another beautiful child like him; a beautiful child who had no say in who his parents were and who had the unfortunate luck of having Lacey Spears as a mother. We need to speak for children like Garnett.

Written in Garnett Spear’s memory and in the memory of all the victims of child abuse.

Sources/Links for further reading:

Losing Garnett. A multi-part piece on the Garnett Spears case:

NY Times article on the case:

Detailed explanation of Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy:

Lacey seeks holisitc doctors for Garnett:


Don’t Judge Me For Being Judgmental–You Judgy Judgmentally Pants!


So I was going to stop talking about mommy pages for a while but then something came up last night that I feel needs further addressing…

An admin of a mommy page asked the most asinine, idiotic, moronic, homophobic question I’ve heard in a while.

As you know, a lot of these mommy pages have a “no bashing” policy. What no bashing really means is, if you disagree with the admin or the original poster (OP)–you are bashing. If you don’t validate their stupidity and their poor decision making–you’re a basher! If you don’t say anything but “Good for you momma, I approve of you teaching your kids to be sexist, racist and homophobic”–you’re bashing. I would post the link to the original thread, but they deleted it. They deleted it because they were getting “bashed and no one was respecting their opinion…”, which translates to, “Most people disagreed with my opinion and since you all don’t agree with me, you’re all bashing me and my parenting.”

The admin stated that she felt it is inappropriate that her child watch a cartoon where one of the characters likes to dress in drag quite frequently–and “he’s always putting on lipstick and wigs.” She felt this would be a bad influence on her daughter. (If you were drinking something, did you spit it out yet all over your computer screen yet?)

Well, anyone old enough to remember Loony Tunes knows that Bugs Bunny liked to dress in drag quite frequently also, to thwart his enemies and as a means of disguise–which translated to humor for the watcher of the cartoon to enjoy.  If seeing a cartoon character dressed in drag makes you squirm a bit, or makes you think of butt-sex, I could just imagine how this person would feel going to the Village Halloween Parade with the cast of Pricilla Queen of the Desert.

My response to this fucking stupidity I just mentioned was, “Seriously? It’s a cartoon. Get a grip. Kids play dress up all the time…” Someone else brought up the Bugs Bunny example. Most people said live and let live, what’s the big deal? Even if you do disagree with the LGBT lifestyle, a smart, sane, mature person doesn’t get on their moral high horse over a cartoon in drag.

Well, that sent the admins of the mommy page into a tailspin. We were all being big, mean, judgy pants! They were for “traditional gender roles” and we were all liberal New York queers and weirdos, who wanted to destroy their “traditional” lifestyle.  I brought up the fact that the original post was in fact, “judgmental”.The positive of all this; most people chiming in on the thread were on the side of sanity last night–the bigots were in the minority and it’s about time.

Which brings me back to the reason I started this post. If you want “bashing free” zones and your “judgement-free pages”, don’t be a hypocrite or an idiot. Don’t post a “question” and “ask for opinions” when you just want validation for your stupidity, your bigotry and your poor parenting. And trust me, some of the shit I see posted is poor parenting and poor behavior–but if you pointed that out, you’re a judgmentally-judgy-bashing-meany pants!

How To Recognize a Cause Troll.

I posted here before regrading the stupid things mommies argue about on Facebook. Some of these arguments can get very heated and some moms get hurt in the process when their parenting choices are belittled, especially when they feel ganged up on. In the real world, these arguments/discussion rarely ever happen, but on the internet they happen with amazing frequency and ferocity. I understand some parents are genuinely interested in these topics, while others just want to get all self-righteous because they’re bored with nothing better to do. But there is a particular element of these debates and discussions that is disingenuous and disheartening–The Cause Troll™.

These trolls don’t care about legitimate causes like curing cancer or ending poverty. They care about controversial issues such as vaccination, circumcision and extended breast-feeding. They only exist to get their agenda across and often use misinformation and propaganda in the process. I have come up with a list of criteria that makes a person a cause troll. Once you have spotted a cause troll in a particular thread, it is just as important to out them because they will continue their vicious fraud if not called out.

Criteria of a Cause Troll (Individually, they do not necessarily make the person a cause troll, but when they fit several of the criterion on the list, they are a Cause Troll)

1) You’ve seen them before. That profile and name look familiar and you’ve seen them on other mommy pages “debating” the classic controversial topics for mommies. Trust your instincts. Take a few minutes to go through the checklist!

2) They like to start “conversations” in groups or pages regarding said cause, but these conversations become rather one-sided. They come across as nice and genuine at first in these conversations, trying to get people on their side, but then you realize they are pandering. If they continuously and repetitiously post a counter to every comment that doesn’t agree with their cause, they could be a Cause Troll. They might also call in a few reinforcements.

3) Their FB cover and profile pic is dedicated to their cause. I am pro-vax and pro-science. I’m anti-religious indoctrination. My FB covers and profile pictures are not dedicated to these causes. If you see someone with a cause based profile pic and cover photo, this means they want their cause to be known to the world and want you to know they are very active with that cause.

4) An unusually large amount of page likes are dedicated to their cause. I like a lot of things. Not just pro-vax pages or science pages. I like George Takei. I like Animals with No Necks. I like Randy Watson of Sexual Chocolate. If someone has a large amount of likes dedicated to one controversial cause, they are most likely a Cause Troll.

5) Public posts regarding their cause that you can see without being their friend. Most of the stuff on my profile is private. People can see a few things, but my wall is completely on lockdown. I don’t feel comfortable letting people I don’t know seeing what I post, even if it is a bunch of cats in silly hats. However, if you’re a cause troll, you want the whole world to know you work for that cause.

6) A post/picture complete with an arrow that says “Ask me about ______” (Fill in controversial cause). This is pretty self-explanatory. “Ask me about ________…” translates into, “I will just tell you my side of the issue and fail to back it up with anything scientific. In fact, I might even stretch the truth to get you to believe what I believe.

For educational purposes, I have included a screen shot of a Cause Troll’s profile, complete with numbers labeling the criteria of why it is a Cause Troll profile. I am protecting her identity not because she has any right to privacy, since her page is public, but because I feel sorry for her kids.


1) Profile pic wearing cause T-shirt.

2) Cover photo dedicated to cause complete with “facts” that have no scientific basis or are even cited, but a reference to causes’ website.

3) “Ask this person about _______” pic. 3b. One controversial mommy cause tied into another. (Circumcision harms breastfeeding, um…okay.)

4) Public Post (not the only one on this person’s wall) that is visible to non-friends about said cause.

5) (Not pictured) Several likes dedicated to her pet cause, as well as other related controversial causes. (Breastfeeding, GMOs, Homeschooling)

6) In one of her photos, her daughter (who looks to be about 6 years of age) is at an “intactivist” protest/event holding a sign for mommy’s cause du jour. In the comments, one sane person asks, “Was it her choice to hold the sign?”, to which this sanctimonious nut-job replied:

Yes, it was. She asked to have something to hold. She sees me doing it with the Intact Georgia wagon and emulates the behavior. She has a great understanding of encroachment and the non-aggression principle so speaking out about not cutting another person’s body makes sense to her. Last week before a bike ride she had us all wait while she made a sign that said, “Say no to ‘circimseson'” on it.

The average six-year-old with sane parents doesn’t go on a penis crusade. Mommy even invited others to share this picture. I refuse because it’s the lowest of the low. How friggin exploitative can you be? This is why Cause Trolls need to be exposed and eliminated.

So I hope I have supplied you with a few tidbits on how to weed these disingenuous fuckers out. Have you seen them somewhere else before? Check their profiles when they start their rants and don’t be afraid to call them out. I did to the aforementioned intactivist and after one comment, she stopped spewing her non-sense. With a little bit of knowledge and some work, we can rid mommy pages and forums of this horrible scourge!

Read/Like/Share My Blog and Go To Heaven. Ignore My Blog and You’ll be Eating the Corn out of Gerald Ford’s Turds in Hell.

love jesus

Did I get you to click on the link by offering salvation or threatening you with damnation? Well congratulations!!!! You are one of the many people who are guilt-tripped into praying for someone or something via social media. You don’t have to go to church anymore to put a dollar in the electronic candle. Now thanks to Facebook, you don’t even have to leave your couch cushions to show people how much you love Jeebus!  A like, a share or a comment equates to a prayer!!! The more likes and shares the picture of Bloody Jesus gets, the better a sick baby in Arkansas will feel.

Do people honestly believe this shit??????? Even though I am no fan of religion, I don’t mind people who are religious. But I do mind people who are stupid.  For once, I want someone who actually shares or likes one of these ridiculous memes to explain to me how you think it will get you to the Pearly Gates? Are you that naive?

Maybe it’s your way of showing people you love God/Jesus/Buddha, but it’s not the right way or the smart way. Your fears are being exploited by the admins of these self-righteous pages for one of the world’s oldest reasons–MONEY. Every time you interact with any of the stupid shit these pages post, they make money from advertising revenue.

If there is a God, he doesn’t care about how many likes that kid dying of cancer gets. And if he did, he/she is one fucked up son of a bitch. If you want to help children with cancer, donate to St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital. (They are an excellent charity). If your heart breaks for tornado victims in Oklahoma, send a few dollars and canned goods their way. If you don’t have money to help, lend a helping hand where it’s needed or give someone a hug.

If you love God and don’t want to go to hell, drop the smartphone and the tablet–because sharing a picture of a hippy Jew being tortured to death is not going to get you any brownie points with the man or woman upstairs.

And if it does, then I don’t want to be in the company of such an attention-starved drama queen anyway!

Hipster Hate Mail


My first piece of hate mail/comment. I am so honored. What little 20 something year old Mike doesn’t realize is that the more he flaps his gums, the farther along my blog goes. For someone who doesn’t think it will go far, he’s trying an awful lot to promote it. I was about to dismiss Mike as someone living in New York off their parents’ money, with nothing to do but ride the subway with his pants off. But then I read his post again and realized Mike and his attitude is what is wrong with the Millennial generation–not just hipsters.  (The italics are his words, the bold type is what he really means.)

“Fuck nugget” Wow. Your blog is clearly going to go so far. (I have nothing else to respond with after being called a fucknugget)

Also, attacking hipsters? You’re so inventive and original! How many millions of viewers do you have? Billions? Zillions? I bet it’s Zillions because you have talent. Real talent. Not that type of Improv Everywhere talent that leads to millions of fans, write ups in The New York Times or being featured on countless television programs. (I only decide what is worthy and good by how many views it gets on Youtube and if it’s written up in New York Times because I’m that fucking shallow and have no brain of my own. If you’re not on youtube or written up in the New York Times, you’re a nobody. I might also work for the PR department of Improv Everywhere.)

No, you have the type of talent that will lead to fucking nothing, no money, or anything positive delivered to your sub-human existence.  (If you don’t have money, like me, well its actually my parents’ money, you’re a nobody. And the only way you’ll be somebody is with money. Things that cost money or give off the appearance of wealth are the only things that are good.)

Enjoy complaining about people who matter in society… (Hipsters like me think I matter and have talent, but I’m actually a herpes sore on the labia of society. We have done nothing to contribute culturally to this city besides asking morons on Kickstarter to fund our pointless and talentless urban art projects and rooftop, sustainable, bee-keeping. If I keep telling myself that I matter, will I make it so, God?)

 and don’t forget to update your website which appears to have been designed by an emotionally unstable monkey (I’m so clever! Look at me Look at me. I made an analogy)

This blog wasn’t even going to focus on hipsters, it just happened to be what my first blog post was about. And Mike’s attitude regarding what is worthy is society, fame and money, is endemic of the generation Mike is apart of. Reality TV and every dick with a camera phone has made young Americans like Mike believe things only matter if they’re in a VINE, or on Instagram, or star in a reality-TV show, or get written up in the New York Times. We need to raise better judges of talent if we want America to be great again.

Just F’n Stop It. Your First World Problems are not Comparable to Trying to Survive in a Nazi Death Camp.

Godwin's Law: (from urban dictionary) A term that originated on Usenet, Godwin's Law states that as an online argument grows longer and more heated, it becomes increasingly likely that somebody will bring up Adolf Hitler or the Nazis. When such an event occurs, the person guilty of invoking Godwin's Law has effectively forfeited the argument.

Godwin’s Law: (from urban dictionary)
A term that originated on Usenet, Godwin’s Law states that as an online argument grows longer and more heated, it becomes increasingly likely that somebody will bring up Adolf Hitler or the Nazis. When such an event occurs, the person guilty of invoking Godwin’s Law has effectively forfeited the argument.

Just stop comparing your first world problems and everything you don’t like or agree with to Nazi Germany. I have seen it mostly done in vaccination debates; the whack job AVers will compare the CDC’s vaccine schedule to Nazi Germany in just about every thread regarding vaccination.

Okay…I get it.  You don’t want to vaccinate you or your kids.  That’s your choice. Hopefully, your kids will not get vaccine preventable disease and/or suffer debilitating side effects because you wanted to be an ignorant, science-denying asshole. However, it is arrogant and completely self-centered to compare getting a vaccine to the suffering Jews endured under the Nazi occupation of Europe. (Yes . Others were persecuted by the Nazis, but the first step of holocaust denial is the failure to recognize that it was a program specifically aimed at eliminating European Jewry!)

I’ve seen the Nazi Germany comparison thousands of times on social media. Obama-care is not like Nazi Germany. Phil Robertson being banned from A & E is not like Nazi Germany. Jennifer Lawrence winning another Golden Globe, although baffling, is not comparable to Nazi Germany. Here is my advice to the little cunts that compare their “suffering” to Nazi Germany:

Go back in time and  live in Nazi Germany or Nazi occupied Poland–and as a Jew too, not a gentile. Then come back to 2014 (if you haven’t been shot into a mass grave or gassed to death) and tell a holocaust survivor with a straight face that getting a vaccine or Obama-care is comparable to what the Nazis did.

Yeah. That’s what I thought.